“I have a 9 year old daughter whose first day of 3rd grade was today and it appears we have “the mean teacher”. I’m thinking of going to see the principal, the teacher, and maybe trying to get her moved into another class. But what can I do if that doesn’t work? Only 179 more days to go. Ugh.”
Sound familiar? It can be agonising trying to work out how to help our child through tough times with their teachers. In situations like this we need to be our children’s advocate. And we also need to keep our focus on building and repairing relationships – with the school and the teacher, and with our children. Around issues to do with school, there are things we can, and things we cannot control. And the place we have real power and influence is in our relationship with our children. Continue reading →
“Together” is the watchword for dealing with news of violence or death. “What can we do together, as a family, to remember those who died, and offer our caring?” is a healing question.
Patty Wipfler, Hand in Hand Parenting
I don’t tend to listen to or watch the news, but sometime on Saturday a couple of weeks ago it filtered through that something dreadful had happened somewhere in the world.
On Sunday, I woke knowing that it was serious, and that I would need some time to talk about how it makes me feel – how lucky am I, how easily it could happen in the city where I live, that my sense of safety in the world is dented. The horror of imagining what it must be like to have been caught in the middle of it, the senseless waste and carnage, the anguish, shock.
I deliberately did not allow myself to listen to details about the event: I’m pretty sure that I do not need to know. I get the gist. Things in the world are not good.
However, my mind was pulled to it all day. In the evening, I met with a group of people and we took a short time, in pairs, just to listen in turn to one another about these events. We cried about how shocking it was, we talked through the details of what we had seen on the news, we feared for our safety, we worried for our children. Then, we went on with what we had planned to meet for.
It would have made no sense to keep going over the top of the feelings. And taking time to pay attention to, and feel, the feelings does not mean that there is not thinking to be done, and work, to fix things. But the flood of feelings that comes up at a time like this can easily overwhelm us, drag us down and away from the thing we planned to do, and the things we could do to make the world a better place.
